We have named the hedgehog “Jane”. She has settled in to her new home, and now that my dense self realizes she doesn’t know how to drink from a water bottle, she is drinking from a bowl, and no longer dehydrated.

Many of you have expressed a desire to adopt a hedgehog of your own. They are a relatively low maintenance pet. I must caution you though – they are not a cuddly animal. You would think this is obvious, what with their SPINE COVERED BODIES and all, but you would be amazed at how many hedgehogs are re-homed because the original owners were surprised at how prickly they are.

Also, they eat creepy-crawlies. If you are uncomfortable getting up close and personal with night crawlers and insects, then a hedgehog is not for you.

mmm, lunch!

tastes like chicken.

We are most definitely in love with little Jane. She is very sweet natured, and even laughs at our fart jokes. Win!

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My stepmother used to have pet alligators. You read that right, alligators. Two of them. One of them was very small. I think around 6 inches. The other one was not so small. I never met them, so I’m guessing based on stories, that the larger alligator was around 2 feet. She called him Mr. Al.

My stepbrother, Justin, was in preschool around that time. Apparently he had a little friend over one day, and he showed that friend Mr. Al. (I know, I know, not only was there a freakin’ ALLIGATOR in the house, but preschoolers were playing unsupervised in the vicinity. Good God! Forget about asking parents if they have a gun in the house – be sure to ask if they are harboring any exotic “pets” capable of maiming or eating your child.) Justin was an industrious little fellow, and told his friend to bring him x number of toys, or he would feed him to Mr. Al. This little friend proceeded to have nightmares, and told his mother about the scary dinosaur at Justin’s house. The mother, being a sane human being, thought he had an overactive imagination. She asked my stepmom if there were any scary dinosaur toys the boys had played with. Knowing exactly what must have happened, my stepmom gave a shrug as if to say “boys will be boys”, but she never mentioned the lethal reptile.

I don’t know what ever happened to Mr. Al or his smaller friend. They were not the last of my stepmom’s exotic pets. She had an 8 foot Burmese python named Clyde. Clyde used to escape his giant terrarium that took up a majority of our living room, and wrap himself around the rafters in our garage.

Aside from Clyde, we had pet chickens, rabbits, dogs, geckos, hermit crabs and more rodents than I can name. Did I mention we lived in Sacramento? IN THE SUBURBS – not out in the middle of farm country.

I’ll never understand what it is that makes people crave the company of exotic, wild animals that would as soon eat you as look at you. Luckily, my stepmom’s tastes run a bit less savage these days. She now has a cat… and a pig named Baby. Hey, at least the pig is a domesticated animal! That’s a step in the right direction.

I’ve rescued tigers, bottle fed squirrels, nursed owls and hawks back to health, and have even been known to foster a crippled tree frog or two. (ALL of which were released back into the wild when deemed appropriate by a veterinarian – with the exception of the tigers, that now reside in a wildlife reserve in California.) I think I can speak with authority when I say that exotic pet “ownership” is not for everyone. Frankly, I’ll go so far as to say that exotic pets should not be left in the care of any layman.

When I hear the tragic stories of people whose faces have been ripped off by their pet chimpanzee, or whose arms were severed by their pet lion, my sympathies lay with the animals; Wild animals that should never have been held in captivity in the first place, and certainly not by average citizens that lack the proper training and facilities.

I guess this makes me a big, fat hypocrite. Yesterday I adopted a hedgehog. Hedgehogs have only begun being domesticated in the last 15 years, and are still considered “exotic”. They are not native to North America or South America. My new hedgehog, like a majority of “pet” hedgehogs in America, is a descendant of African pygmy hedgehogs.

I didn’t decide to get a hedgehog on a whim because I thought they were cute. I did research, weighed the pros and cons, and spoke with hedgehog enthusiasts before deciding a hedgehog would be a nice fit for my family. I encourage anyone considering adopting any pet to do your homework first.

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We are now a family of five. Introducing…. Uh, well, we haven’t named her yet. She is an 8 week old salt and pepper hoglet.

Karis has started calling her Cola. As I am anti-soda, this will not do! I would love suggestions!! I’ll leave comments open until the perfect name has been chosen.

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